| | I am spiraling out of control. Things are no better or worse than they have ever been, but for some reason I always seem to screw them around in my mind. I got a full time job, but i am still not happy. All I want to do is "dance my pain away." But I can't. I miss the carefree nature of the Dominican people, especially since it is gettting warmer out. My PCDR group 517 -01 is back, but most of them are all buddied up so they can relate to each other, whilst I had to wait half a year before people could understand my angst at being forced back into the reality of the U.S.A. All I want to do is walk to the disco down the street and play dominoes and drink beer without being judged as being lazy. I can't get myself together still. Just when I feel like things are looking up I sink down again. Why does this country make me feel like this. I can't get away no matter where I go. Why am I forced to write my feelings on a stupid blog in order to make myself heard, but still ignored. People don't pay attention. If people put more effort into their friends and family instead of their "significant others" they would probably feel more at ease. No matter how many friends you rack up on myspace and facebook they won't truly matter. Nobody cares. Everyone is selfish. Does it sound like I am cracking up yet? Well I am. Every night. I think about how lost and hopeless everything is. If anything I hope in the end this recession makes people rely more on themselves and community rather than money because that is what really matters. I can't stand it. AAARRRRGGGHHHH
I think that expression of angst pretty much sums it up. |
| | Posted 5/4/2009 1:37 AM - 53 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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